What do you say to those in grief who has lost a loved one, whether that person was a human or a pet friend? How do you express yourself to comfort and support during a time of intense emotional distress? The following are words that are worthy of sharing so I am passing them along to my readers. I hope you enjoy them.
As the days and weeks pass, and as you return to life’s routine, may you continue to feel comforted by the love and support of family and friends.
I was so sorry to hear of your loss. Please let me know if there is anything I can do to help at this time.
I was so sorry to hear of your loss. The thoughts of many are with you at this time of sorrow.
May God bless you and your family in this time of sorrow.
May the love of friends and family carry you through your grief.
May your hearts soon be filled with wonderful memories of joyful times together as you celebrate a life well-lived.
My heart goes out to you at this time and in the days ahead.
My thoughts and prayers are with you in your time of grief. May your memories bring you comfort.
No bond is as great as that between a parent and child. Our deepest condolences are with you as you grieve.
Our hearts go out to you at this time and in the days ahead.
Our thoughts and prayers are with you in your time of grief. May your memories bring you comfort.
Please accept our deepest sympathies.
Take comfort in knowing that now you have a special guardian angel to watch over you.
The loss of someone so close is difficult to bear. We share your grief.
We were so sorry to hear of your loss. Please let us know if there is anything we can do to help at this time.
We were so sorry to hear of your loss. The thoughts of many are with you at this time of sorrow.
You are in our thoughts and prayers.
Take a peak at http://www.ruthann1.com for many other thoughtful expressions that may help you say or write words that are appropriate for the occasion.
Burton Fletcher
Burton@USAMonuments.com
Showing posts with label Grief. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Grief. Show all posts
Sunday, May 13, 2007
Friday, December 22, 2006
Recognize Mental Illness And Recommend Treatment
I read the post of a monument builder on another website and this person launched into an angry, insulting and immature attack on another member. It was obvious that the attacker has mental-health issues that will harm his performance in the death-care industry, where serving others is paramount.
Mental illness is pervasive in our society, and often the mentally ill do not receive the treatment that they need and deserve. If you see someone with excessive anger issues, then please recommend that the person receive the assistance of mental-health professionals. Today, thanks to American pharmacological prowess, many previously untreatable illnesses can be treated and controlled.
If you recognize that you have problems with controlling your excessive anger, then rather than taking out your anger on others, destroying the lives of others, and yourself, then please seek help so you will not only live long, but live well. After all, it is the right thing to do. May God bless you!
Burton Fletcher
http://www.usamonuments.com/
Burton@USAMonuments.com
Mental illness is pervasive in our society, and often the mentally ill do not receive the treatment that they need and deserve. If you see someone with excessive anger issues, then please recommend that the person receive the assistance of mental-health professionals. Today, thanks to American pharmacological prowess, many previously untreatable illnesses can be treated and controlled.
If you recognize that you have problems with controlling your excessive anger, then rather than taking out your anger on others, destroying the lives of others, and yourself, then please seek help so you will not only live long, but live well. After all, it is the right thing to do. May God bless you!
Burton Fletcher
http://www.usamonuments.com/
Burton@USAMonuments.com
Wednesday, December 06, 2006
Family Squabbles And Monument Replacement
I received a call this morning in my capacity as president of the Georgia Monument Builders Association.
"I'm from Florida," the woman said, "and my sister replaced our parent's monument without informing me."
Apparently, her sister had replaced the monument for her mother and father without bothering to ask her permission, much less to even inform her! Obviously, she was "in shock," when she discovered this insult.
She stated, "daddy didn't even have a monument for (something) years." "My sister didn't think they should have a double monument since they were divorced."
Apparently, it was important enough for the sister to replace a double headstone with two single headstones since mother and father had divorced in the past.
So, what advice would you give in this situation?
"Ma'am," I said, hesitantly, "there are no good answers for you."
"You could sue the monument company, for the original monument, but they are out of business, and what would you do with the stone?"
"You could sue your sister, but that would just generate ill will."
"You could sue the church too, but you probably don't want to do that either."
"It must have been very important to your sister if she was willing to incur this expense. I would just let it go."
"I know," she said, "but I'm just in shock."
In my opinion, her sister handled this entire situation poorly. Family decisions require family consensus for family harmony. When one person goes off to unilaterally make decisions, even when well meaning, then the other family members have a right to be disappointed.
If faced with a similar decision, I hope you will do the right thing. After all, the right thing, is the right thing to do!
If you have thoughts you wish to share, please email me at Burton@USAMonuments.com and I will post select comments on this site. I thank you in advance for your contributions to improve the death-care industry, memorialization and honor the loved ones of grieving families. Burton Fletcher Owner http://www.usamonuments.com/
"I'm from Florida," the woman said, "and my sister replaced our parent's monument without informing me."
Apparently, her sister had replaced the monument for her mother and father without bothering to ask her permission, much less to even inform her! Obviously, she was "in shock," when she discovered this insult.
She stated, "daddy didn't even have a monument for (something) years." "My sister didn't think they should have a double monument since they were divorced."
Apparently, it was important enough for the sister to replace a double headstone with two single headstones since mother and father had divorced in the past.
So, what advice would you give in this situation?
"Ma'am," I said, hesitantly, "there are no good answers for you."
"You could sue the monument company, for the original monument, but they are out of business, and what would you do with the stone?"
"You could sue your sister, but that would just generate ill will."
"You could sue the church too, but you probably don't want to do that either."
"It must have been very important to your sister if she was willing to incur this expense. I would just let it go."
"I know," she said, "but I'm just in shock."
In my opinion, her sister handled this entire situation poorly. Family decisions require family consensus for family harmony. When one person goes off to unilaterally make decisions, even when well meaning, then the other family members have a right to be disappointed.
If faced with a similar decision, I hope you will do the right thing. After all, the right thing, is the right thing to do!
If you have thoughts you wish to share, please email me at Burton@USAMonuments.com and I will post select comments on this site. I thank you in advance for your contributions to improve the death-care industry, memorialization and honor the loved ones of grieving families. Burton Fletcher Owner http://www.usamonuments.com/
Tuesday, December 05, 2006
Mental Illness, Difficult Clients & Service In The Monument Industry
Some time back, the daughter of a client filed a malicious and illegitimate complaint against me personally, and my company, saying we had not manufactured a monument as we had been instructed to do.
The facts were contrary to what this woman was saying and all of our attempts to resolve her complaints were met with hostile reactions. Though we tried, there was no appeasing this person. All of us have, at one time or another, known individuals who were excessively, and unrealistically, fault finding.
This woman had numerous altercations with a wide assortment of individuals and she acted in a bizarre manner with severe and wide mood swings. We enjoyed working with her father, but she was an irascible individual who attacked me privately and publicly, and both personally, and professionally. I was just one of many individuals with whom she was in open conflict as she sought to “protect” her father, who, in all respects, is a man of great character and honor.
Today, I received a message that this woman had recently been incarcerated pursuant to the Baker Act, a Florida statute that allows involuntary mental evaluations under various conditions. See, http://www.dcf.state.fl.us/mentalhealth/laws/index.shtml. The Baker Act is a law that gives the police or doctors the broad power to lock up individuals for 72 hours for observation if it is believed that they may be harmful to themselves or others.
Whether involuntary, or voluntary, I hope this woman will receive the psychiatric assistance she desperately needs. I am a strong proponent for supporting and treating individuals who suffer from mental illness. Her incarceration validated my belief that this woman was unable to make rational decisions due to her mental illness.
As monument builders, we must always strive to exercise patience with the families whom we serve. It is not always easy, but we should try. Sooner or later, the truth will come to light and victims will be exonerated of the aspersions cast falsely upon them.
Pray for and support individuals with mental illness especially during times of mourning and through the cycles of grief, as “the final straw” may occur as a result of the loss of a loved one. It is not always easy, but always remember that some personal attacks are the imperfection of the attacker and not the fault of the accused.
Proverbs 3:30, "Do not accuse a man for no reason — when he has done you no harm."
Proverbs 19:5, " A false witness will not go unpunished, and he who pours out lies will not go free."
If you have thoughts you wish to share, please email me at Burton@USAMonuments.com and I will post select comments on this site. I thank you in advance for your contributions to improve the death-care industry, memorialization and honor the loved ones of grieving families.
Burton Fletcher
Owner
http://www.usamonuments.com/
The facts were contrary to what this woman was saying and all of our attempts to resolve her complaints were met with hostile reactions. Though we tried, there was no appeasing this person. All of us have, at one time or another, known individuals who were excessively, and unrealistically, fault finding.
This woman had numerous altercations with a wide assortment of individuals and she acted in a bizarre manner with severe and wide mood swings. We enjoyed working with her father, but she was an irascible individual who attacked me privately and publicly, and both personally, and professionally. I was just one of many individuals with whom she was in open conflict as she sought to “protect” her father, who, in all respects, is a man of great character and honor.
Today, I received a message that this woman had recently been incarcerated pursuant to the Baker Act, a Florida statute that allows involuntary mental evaluations under various conditions. See, http://www.dcf.state.fl.us/mentalhealth/laws/index.shtml. The Baker Act is a law that gives the police or doctors the broad power to lock up individuals for 72 hours for observation if it is believed that they may be harmful to themselves or others.
Whether involuntary, or voluntary, I hope this woman will receive the psychiatric assistance she desperately needs. I am a strong proponent for supporting and treating individuals who suffer from mental illness. Her incarceration validated my belief that this woman was unable to make rational decisions due to her mental illness.
As monument builders, we must always strive to exercise patience with the families whom we serve. It is not always easy, but we should try. Sooner or later, the truth will come to light and victims will be exonerated of the aspersions cast falsely upon them.
Pray for and support individuals with mental illness especially during times of mourning and through the cycles of grief, as “the final straw” may occur as a result of the loss of a loved one. It is not always easy, but always remember that some personal attacks are the imperfection of the attacker and not the fault of the accused.
Proverbs 3:30, "Do not accuse a man for no reason — when he has done you no harm."
Proverbs 19:5, " A false witness will not go unpunished, and he who pours out lies will not go free."
If you have thoughts you wish to share, please email me at Burton@USAMonuments.com and I will post select comments on this site. I thank you in advance for your contributions to improve the death-care industry, memorialization and honor the loved ones of grieving families.
Burton Fletcher
Owner
http://www.usamonuments.com/
Thursday, November 16, 2006
An Update On Losing A Pet
It has been said that "time heals all wounds." I'm not sure that wounds are ever healed; however, the pain subsides as we go on with our lives.
I still feel the loss of Muffin, my beloved Chihuahua, though it has been a little over two months since her passing. Though she can never be replaced, a wonderful joy came into my life with the adoption of Bobby, a Chihuahua, and Dusty, a Britany Spaniel.
Bobby is my favorite of the two as he is compact and the house dog of the two. Dusty is a pure bred and high strung. He is a sweet dog, though his numerous antics for chewing up water hoses, digging holes and the like test me on a frequent basis. Yes, I love them both. I adopted both from the pound in remembrance of Muffin. I felt like it was the right thing to do and I have never once regretted my decision.
Bobby had been abused sometime in his past. He still has a buck shot pellet in his left front leg. When he runs, he lifts his left rear leg. I cannot imagine the circumstances where anyone would want to harm an animal so small.
Bobby was quick tempered when we first adopted him. With lots of love, his temperament has changed, and he is obviously in love with us, just as we are in love with him. When we go to the door, he is right there with us, ready to go for a ride just as we took Muffin with us throughout her life.
I still miss Muffin and her cremains rest beneath my desk in a beautiful urn. Life goes on with or without us and we might as well accept that the world is not going to stop turning when we pass on. Life is short under the best of circumstances, and for too many folks, it is cut even shorter. We never know when we are going to pull out in front of a semi-truck, so we should have our affairs in order.
I love you Muffin. I love you Bobby. I love you Dusty. Life is so much better with the joy that our pet friends bring into our lives. Amen!
Share with us by emailing your thoughts to Burton@USAMonuments.com.
I still feel the loss of Muffin, my beloved Chihuahua, though it has been a little over two months since her passing. Though she can never be replaced, a wonderful joy came into my life with the adoption of Bobby, a Chihuahua, and Dusty, a Britany Spaniel.
Bobby is my favorite of the two as he is compact and the house dog of the two. Dusty is a pure bred and high strung. He is a sweet dog, though his numerous antics for chewing up water hoses, digging holes and the like test me on a frequent basis. Yes, I love them both. I adopted both from the pound in remembrance of Muffin. I felt like it was the right thing to do and I have never once regretted my decision.
Bobby had been abused sometime in his past. He still has a buck shot pellet in his left front leg. When he runs, he lifts his left rear leg. I cannot imagine the circumstances where anyone would want to harm an animal so small.
Bobby was quick tempered when we first adopted him. With lots of love, his temperament has changed, and he is obviously in love with us, just as we are in love with him. When we go to the door, he is right there with us, ready to go for a ride just as we took Muffin with us throughout her life.
I still miss Muffin and her cremains rest beneath my desk in a beautiful urn. Life goes on with or without us and we might as well accept that the world is not going to stop turning when we pass on. Life is short under the best of circumstances, and for too many folks, it is cut even shorter. We never know when we are going to pull out in front of a semi-truck, so we should have our affairs in order.
I love you Muffin. I love you Bobby. I love you Dusty. Life is so much better with the joy that our pet friends bring into our lives. Amen!
Share with us by emailing your thoughts to Burton@USAMonuments.com.
Losing A Pet
MONDAY, SEPTEMBER 11, 2006
LOSING A PET
August 16, 2006 was a very sad day in the Fletcher household. On that day, I lost a beloved pet friend. The following are words that I wrote on that day.
I am sad; very, very sad today, Wednesday, August 16, 2006. My pet friend, Muffin, a beautiful Chihuahua died in my arms as a result of congestive heart failure.
I was crying as I began typing my thoughts today. I knew Muffin had heart troubles and I was treating her as the veterinarian prescribed. This morning, she let out a petitioning wail and I knew it was her end when I saw her.
I picked her up and a few minutes later she died in my arms. Muffin had let out a cry of pain in recent weeks as she was unable to breathe. This time, I picked her up and it was obvious that she was in the process of dying.
My efforts to resuscitate her using mouth-to-mouth resuscitation were not successful. I held her in my arms and in a few minutes she exhaled her last breath.
I loved this pet friend as she was my closest companion during some of the most difficult times of my life. She was with me when I felt abandoned by my friends and was stoned by my enemies.
On most nights, she slept beneath the covers of my bed. There were very few trips away from home when Muffin was not with me.
This is a very sad time for me!
Grieving is not a pleasant emotion.
My best friend, Emi (pronounced “Amy”) age 77 and a victim of dementia, and for whom I am a caregiver, held Muffin’s lifeless body in her arms and against her chest for the longest time.
Though I tried to close them, Muffin’s eyes remained open. Her tongue was out. Her ears were pointed high. Muffin looked as if death had brought her peace!
We respectfully wrapped Muffin’s body in a new blanket and neatly folded the package. We placed the blanket in a box for transport to the veterinarian so Muffin’s body can later be transported to a cremation facility in Gainesville, Florida. It is my desire that Muffin’s ashes be placed along side of Emi’s and mine inside the crypt that will hold our cremains.
Months ago, I installed a memorial for all of my pets at the Fletcher Memorial. This is a very sad day as I have lost the joy of having a great friend. I will cherish the memories during the years we shared together as she was a very special buddy who brought great joy to Emi and me.
Friends of mine arrived and I received a hug of condolence. I asked them to take Muffin’s body to the veterinarian which they did. After they left, Emi cried tearfully and hugged me saying, “Who is going to take Muffin’s place?” In truth, no one, and no pet, will take Muffin’s place. She was very special!
Burton
Share with us by emailing your thoughts to Burton@USAMonuments.com.
LOSING A PET
August 16, 2006 was a very sad day in the Fletcher household. On that day, I lost a beloved pet friend. The following are words that I wrote on that day.
I am sad; very, very sad today, Wednesday, August 16, 2006. My pet friend, Muffin, a beautiful Chihuahua died in my arms as a result of congestive heart failure.
I was crying as I began typing my thoughts today. I knew Muffin had heart troubles and I was treating her as the veterinarian prescribed. This morning, she let out a petitioning wail and I knew it was her end when I saw her.
I picked her up and a few minutes later she died in my arms. Muffin had let out a cry of pain in recent weeks as she was unable to breathe. This time, I picked her up and it was obvious that she was in the process of dying.
My efforts to resuscitate her using mouth-to-mouth resuscitation were not successful. I held her in my arms and in a few minutes she exhaled her last breath.
I loved this pet friend as she was my closest companion during some of the most difficult times of my life. She was with me when I felt abandoned by my friends and was stoned by my enemies.
On most nights, she slept beneath the covers of my bed. There were very few trips away from home when Muffin was not with me.
This is a very sad time for me!
Grieving is not a pleasant emotion.
My best friend, Emi (pronounced “Amy”) age 77 and a victim of dementia, and for whom I am a caregiver, held Muffin’s lifeless body in her arms and against her chest for the longest time.
Though I tried to close them, Muffin’s eyes remained open. Her tongue was out. Her ears were pointed high. Muffin looked as if death had brought her peace!
We respectfully wrapped Muffin’s body in a new blanket and neatly folded the package. We placed the blanket in a box for transport to the veterinarian so Muffin’s body can later be transported to a cremation facility in Gainesville, Florida. It is my desire that Muffin’s ashes be placed along side of Emi’s and mine inside the crypt that will hold our cremains.
Months ago, I installed a memorial for all of my pets at the Fletcher Memorial. This is a very sad day as I have lost the joy of having a great friend. I will cherish the memories during the years we shared together as she was a very special buddy who brought great joy to Emi and me.
Friends of mine arrived and I received a hug of condolence. I asked them to take Muffin’s body to the veterinarian which they did. After they left, Emi cried tearfully and hugged me saying, “Who is going to take Muffin’s place?” In truth, no one, and no pet, will take Muffin’s place. She was very special!
Burton
Share with us by emailing your thoughts to Burton@USAMonuments.com.
Friday, June 09, 2006
Beautiful Memories & The Wisdom Of Clients
I have great relationships with our clients. In one way or another, I seem to learn something from all of my clients. Sandy Reeves hired us to build a memorial for her dad. A message on her email had the following quote: "I dropped a tear in the ocean. When they find it; that's when I'll stop remembering you..."
Those words speak volumes about the bonds we form with our loved ones. I hope you share those same bonds with others in your life. I also hope when you pass away someone will memorialize your memory for eternity. After all, every life is precious and through memorialization, we communicate our love to others.
Sandy, thank you for giving me inspiration.
"I dropped a tear in the ocean. When they find it; that's when I'll stop remembering you..."
Share with us by emailing your thoughts to Burton@USAMonuments.com.
Those words speak volumes about the bonds we form with our loved ones. I hope you share those same bonds with others in your life. I also hope when you pass away someone will memorialize your memory for eternity. After all, every life is precious and through memorialization, we communicate our love to others.
Sandy, thank you for giving me inspiration.
"I dropped a tear in the ocean. When they find it; that's when I'll stop remembering you..."
Share with us by emailing your thoughts to Burton@USAMonuments.com.
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